Lord, I will trust in You.: Is there a difference between joy and happiness?

iwilltrustinyou:

A dictionary definition of happiness is “a state of well-being, a pleasurable or satisfying experience.” The definition of the word “rejoice,” from which our word “joy” comes, is “to feel great delight, to welcome or to be glad.” Depending on the translation, the Bible uses the words “happy” and “happiness” about 30 times, while “joy” and “rejoice” appear over 300 times. If we look at some verses it will help us understand why joy is different from happiness.

Genesis 30:1-13tells the story of two sisters, Rachel and Leah, and their rivalry over their husband, Jacob. Each woman tries to have more male children in order to please him, even using their handmaidens to conceive more offspring. Leah’s handmaiden, Zilpah, bore Jacob a second son, and verse 13 says, “Then Leah said, ‘Happy am I! For women have called me happy.’ So she named him Asher.” Thus the word “happy” comes from the Hebrew root wordasharand means “to set right or be blessed.” We also find the word “happiness” inDeuteronomy 24:5, which says, “When a man takes a new wife, he shall not go out with the army nor be charged with any duty; he shall be free at home one year and shall give happiness to his wife whom he has taken.”

The word “joy” comes from the Greek root wordcharaand means “to be exceedingly glad.”James 1:2says, “Consider it all joy, my brothers, when you encounter various trials.” How could we ever consider going through difficulties and trials a reason to feel joy?James 1:3-4gives us a clue when it says, “Knowing that the testing of our faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” The deep, abiding joy comes as we persevere through trials, with God’s help, and our faith matures and is strengthened. So happiness tends to be fleeting and depends upon temporal factors like circumstances or other people.

Joy, on the other hand, is true contentment that comes from internal factors like our faith in the Lord. True joy is everlasting and not dependent upon circumstances. The book of Philippians is a great study in the difference between joy and happiness. Written by the Apostle Paul while imprisoned in Rome, this book uses the words “joy,” “rejoice,” and “joyful” 16 times and teaches us how to have true contentment in Jesus Christ, despite our circumstances. In chains and aware that his life was coming to an end, Paul talks about his faith and trust in Christ and how it had changed his whole perspective on suffering. InPhilippians 1:12-24, Paul says that because of his two-year imprisonment (Acts 28:30), the whole Roman guard heard the gospel from him, and it had even spread throughout all of Rome. In verse 18 Paul says, “What then? Only that in every way, whether in pretense or in truth, Christ is proclaimed; and in this I rejoice, yes, and I will rejoice.” Paul goes on to encourage others to have peace knowing that God strengthens us (Philippians 4:13) and “supplies all our needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19).

So the Bible teaches that happiness is fleeting because it often depends on things outside of ourselves, but true joy is eternal because it is based on our relationship with Jesus Christ, which is itself an everlasting source of joy.

It’s so cool and awesome that God not only saves us in His grace and loves us, He showers us with blessings and gives us everlasting joy, working for the good of those who love Him, even when things seem tough. Psalm 1:1-3 helped me this week =)

J.S. Park: Question: Is Depression and Anxiety a Choice?

jspark3000:

Anonymous asked:

A lot of hurting young people on my dash. Is depression and anxiety a choice? My pastor believes it is. “Generational curses”, “biblical strongholds”, etc. Thoughts?

All right, dammit: Who is this pastor? I’m a fifth degree black belt and I can break into a house by scaling a wall, so give me an address and a picture and I’ll have a friendly interrogation with him. I’m trying to see what he means — but no.

Seriously though, most people who don’t suffer from depression or anxiety just don’t get it. It’s like telling someone you have a migraine and they offer you a glass of water. You sort of want to punch their face off.

Pseudo-biblical language that doesn’t even speak to reality only shortcuts a huge issue. You can tell me to “rebuke it in Jesus’ name” all day long, but I need some freaking help.

Let’s get this part right: while not all our emotions point to legitimate choices, having feelings is NOT wrong. You’re allowed to feel your feelings, all right? It’s okay to be a human being and no one should ever blame you for that.

If you’re denying your emotions, you’re also denying your humanness. Even the spoiled little princess on the latest reality show gets a fair hearing on why she flipped a desk about getting the wrong-colored car (hint: it’s not about the car, but her emptiness). What’s important then is to examine why this is happening and how to react in the moment.

People go through different seasons and occasionally experience severe internal weather patterns that you don’t just “choose” your way out of. There’s no easy off-button for those cloudy emotional fogs that suddenly overtake you. A lot is at work here — upbringing, situations, spiritual warfare, personality — so blanket-answers will not help.

But for a moment, let’s assume that depression and anxiety are “curses” or “strongholds” or whatever. You still need to know how to battle it. That’s where this kind of thinking falls short. If I told a depressed person, “Just snap out of it” — that could work for a day, at most. If I told them, “Pray off that curse” or “Refuse the stronghold,” that’s not equipping anyone for the daily war of the heart.

I’ve had a lifelong struggle with depression, and can I tell you what works? Having a great community of friends who are there for me, who can handle my craziness, who still love me through my humiliating, whiny, ugly, slobbery, overdramatic bouts of unfiltered emotional explosion.

I’m grateful for friends who sometimes force me to get dressed and go out and get ice cream and pamper me way beyond what I deserve. They just sit next to me without lecturing me or throwing around verses or saying trite pick-me-up cliches. Jesus is the same way: he doesn’t condescend when I’m depressed. He loves me right through it and meets me where I’m at.

What also works: just straight worship, and talking with Jesus, and exercise, and re-listening to that one sermon that encouraged me so long ago, and serving in a place of broken people. To do what you’re made to do will move you past the hurt, even if it’s just one step.

The truth is that actually battling depression is a messy task of digging deep and getting dirty. That’s why a lot of ignorant ministry workers use half-baked language to escape the gritty work of diving in the deep end. Almost no one naturally moves towards a depressed person because we think, “Well he’s rich, he’s good-looking, she’s got it together, why would she cut herself, why would he be on meds” — and that’s really a way of saying, “I’m too selfish to serve that person. I only serve people that are nice and clean and pure. I’m too lazy to understand.”

The church has got to be the safest, most gracious, loving place on the face of the earth. No one should ever be shamed for their brokenness. No one can be left behind. No one’s sin deserves more or less attention, and we all have equal access to the Heavenly Father by way of His Son.

It was Jesus who stepped into the mess without qualifying anyone, and he calls us to do the same. He didn’t just tell us that our sin-broken condition is bad: he showed us a way out and a path forward towards him, to the greatest joy. If you can help someone make even a step in that journey, they will be grateful forever.

Also read:

- Helping A Friend With Anxiety and Depression — What To Do and NOT To Do

- The Ground War Against Depression and Anxiety

- The Warfare of Discouragement

- Everything Is Killing Me

- Lee Younger: Sometimes You Get Depressed. Jesus Gets That And He’s Not Upset With You

J.S. Park: Question: Helping A Friend With Anxiety & Depression -- What To Do and NOT Do

jspark3000:

Anonymous asked:

Could you share some practical advice for the friends of those who are struggling with anxiety and depression? What should we do and what should we not do to best encourage our brother/sister during such dark seasons?

A great question, and thank you for caring to ask!  You’re already an awesome friend for it.  Thank you also for not diminishing the issue: anxiety and depression are very real, not just “in your head,” and can be completely debilitating.

Much of this will be common sense, but since I also struggle with depression, I have a bit of firsthand knowledge of being on the other side.

First, what NOT to do:

1) Please, no inspirational pick-me-up cliched lectures.

In fact, let’s also skip the innocent sharing of Bible verses.  When someone is anxious or depressed, there’s a crazy-thick shell around their ears that deflects pretty much anything, or will somehow reverse words into something worse.

What’s needed is presence. Even silence.  When Job got totally blown up and lost everything, the best thing his friends did (until they began to lecture him for 30-something chapters) is sat with him in silence for a week.

Please do not jump immediately to spiritual, practical, biblical monologues.  Please do not try to instantly relate and say, “Yeah that reminds me this one time when I also …”  Don’t point to a website or a Bible verse or a doctor (there’s a time for that). It can be very insensitive and it’s also a huge reason why Christians in particular look like robotic cheerleading machines.

2) Invite them out to something fun.

Most people who are Type-A “Fixer” personalities assume that when someone is hurting, then that is ALL they should talk about.  A Fixer presumes that if they just dig enough, use surgical words, have a caring tone, and press persistently, then we can get to the “root of the issue” and be done with it like a math problem.

While part of this is very true and noble, an anxious or depressed person is NOT only composed of their issues.  They are a whole person with likes, dislikes, wants, needs, dreams, hobbies, goals.  They also sometimes just want to eat a burger, watch a dumb movie, replay a YouTube video, listen to loud music, lose at bowling, fall down in a skating rink, catch a frisbee, run a mile, or drink hot cocoa.  Ask them: If you could do whatever right now, what do you want to do?  Then go do that with them.

Eventually you can get to the root stuff, but keep a holistic picture in mind.  When I was at the bottom of depression, I didn’t talk to the guy who kept poking at my hard heart.  I opened up to the ones who brought me candy and their dog to my house.  This is not shallow: because real human beings need a day off, even from their own brains.

3) Overjoyed cheerfulness to compensate does not help.

I’ve met some people who assume that an opposite attitude will lift someone out of anxiety/depression.  So “confidence” can somehow counter an anxious attitude, or “super-cheerful-perkiness” can attack depression. 

No.  I understand the reasoning behind this, but in the long-term it’s actually very painful.  I mean if you told me you wanted to cut yourself and I said, “There’s a sale on belts at Saks!” — that will hurt deep. 

It’s okay to get on the same wavelength even when you don’t understand their pain.  In psychology they falsely teach you to remain distant, detached, and emotionless when you counsel.  That doesn’t help either.  It’s okay to cry together, to agree that life sucks sometimes, to feel their anger, to share their concerns.  It will drain you a bit, but that’s part of being a friend and a Christian servant.

Here’s stuff to consider that you can do:

1) RTP — Rock The Prayer

When the time is right, pray for them on the spot.  I know many of us say, “I’ll be praying for you” and then forget, so just pray for them right there.  It might feel awkward, but most times people DO want prayer and don’t know how to ask.  Some people feel selfish, often thinking, “Oh don’t pray for little old me, there’s bigger stuff out there.”  Take the initiative.  Show them you care, now.  You will also be secretly teaching them how to pray.

2) Firmly speak truth that looks forward.

At some point, the truth has to be said.  We cannot stay in Pamper/Coddle/Spoil mode forever. Let them know: even if they don’t feel like it, they cannot stay crippled by their feelings forever.  They also are NOT allowed to use you as a whining board for self-pity. 

You know how when someone gets a cold, they act a bit sick even when they’ve recovered?  I don’t mean to say that anxiety/depression is the same way, but there has to be movement forward regardless of feelings.  When someone ends up quitting school, their job, their family, their church, or any number of commitments, that’s allowing the problem to win.  When someone can keep going despite their feelings, then they have won another day. Help them towards that victory.

Sooner or later, they must move into a new season of their life, because life goes on.  Anxiety/depression might be a lifelong struggle, but that’s more reason to move forward and not less.

This can be tricky, because we want to be sensitive yet at the same time call out childish behavior.  Don’t enable them to go backwards into pity-party reflexes.  This will require a lot of discernment, but please don’t feel like you’re being mean if you eventually have to pick them up roughly. 

3) Dig it out: heart surgery.

While clinical depression and diagnosed anxiety are formidable unreasonable beasts (see the next point), there are almost always tangible reasons why someone is so depressed or anxious.  Let them know first: it is NOT a sin and it is NOT wrong to feel this way.  But there is some elephant (or circus of elephants) that needs to be confronted, or else they will be paralyzed.

Just listen.  Sometimes when things are said out loud, that’s already halfway to a solution.  It could be family stuff, a stressful lifestyle, a secret sin, a past trauma.  It could be a lie they believe. Let them let it out.

Once you want to tell your friend to confront something, suggest the options.  When I lay out options for people (instead of direct commands), they always figure out the best one themselves.  Since they figured it out, they are more willing to do it AND believe in what they’re doing. 

4) You can always refer them.

Please never assume you’re the only one who can help them.  Sometimes we are in way over our heads.  If it gets very, very bad, you can always suggest medical/professional help.  Let them know there’s nothing wrong with seeing a counselor.  They can go to your pastor, an elder, a deacon, an older Christian brother or sister. I have my own counselor, and really: the world would be a way better place if we all got regular counseling.  Nothing wrong with it AT ALL.

Please do this with sensitivity, too.  It might look like you’re “passing them off,” but remain available.  I wouldn’t suggest this as a first resort, but I know when I’ve met my limitations as a friend.  I myself have been referred to other counselors as well. 

If your friend agrees, tell them you can go with them for the first session or so.  Maybe it won’t work for them or it won’t be the right counselor the first time: that’s okay. This is not a one-time thing.  Persistence and patience.

Great post!

Question: The Ground War Against Depression and Anxiety

Good advice =)

Defeat them lies! Also, this one’s got suiting up in armour =P:

http://thewayeverlasting.com/2012/01/23/the-warfare-of-discouragement/

Lord, I will trust in You.: Where is God now? Where is God when it hurts?

iwilltrustinyou:

The Bible teaches that God reigns over the nations from His holy throne in heaven (Psalm 47:8; Isaiah 6:1, 66:1; Hebrews 4:16). Even though we know that God’s presence is in some sense uniquely in heaven, the teachings of Scripture also make it clear that God is omnipresent (present everywhere at the same time). From the beginning of Scripture, we see the presence of God hovering over the earth, even when it was still formless and empty (Genesis 1:2). God filled the world with His creation, and His presence and glory continue to inhabit the whole earth (Numbers 14:21). There are many examples throughout Scripture of God’s presence moving on the earth, interacting with His creation (Genesis 3:8; Deuteronomy 23:14; Exodus 3:2; 1 Kings 19:11-18; Luke 1:35;Acts 16:7). Hebrews 4:13 says, “Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give an account.” Jeremiah 23:24 exclaims, “‘Can anyone hide in secret places so that I cannot see him?’ declares the Lord. ‘Do not I fill heaven and earth?’ declares the Lord.” Psalm 139 is an amazing study in God’s omnipresence.

Where is God?
If you are a believer in Jesus Christ, God is with you, beside you, above you, and inside you. God’s presence and watchful care never leave you. If you are not a believer in Jesus Christ, God is right in front of you, inviting you, drawing you, offering you the love, mercy, and grace that He longs to give you. If you are unsure of your relationship with God through Jesus Christ, please read our article on how to “Get right with God.” Perhaps a better question than “Where is God?” is “Where are you, in relationship to God?”

Where is God when it hurts?
It seems we desire to know the answer to this question most when faced with painful trials and attacks of doubt. Even Jesus, during His crucifixion, asked, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46). To the onlookers of that time, as well as to those who first read the story, it seems that God did forsake Jesus, so we obviously conclude that He will forsake us as well in our darkest moments. Yet, upon continued observation of the events that unfolded after the crucifixion, the truth is revealed that nothing can separate us from the love of God, not even death (Romans 8:37-39). After Jesus was crucified, He was glorified (1 Peter 1:21; Mark 16:6, 19; Romans 4:24-25). From this example alone we can be assured that even when we do not feel God’s presence in the midst of our pain, we can still believe His promise that He will never leave us nor forsake us (Hebrews 13:5). “God sometimes permits what He hates to accomplish what He loves” (Joni Erickson Tada).

We put our trust in the fact that God does not lie, He never changes, and His Word stands true forever (Numbers 23:19; 1 Samuel 15:29; Psalm 110:4; Malachi 3:6; Hebrews 7:21;13:8, James 1:17; 1 Peter 1:25). We do not lose heart over painful circumstances because we live by faith in every word that has proceeded from the mouth of God, not putting our hope in what is seen or perceived. We trust God that our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs all the suffering that we will endure on this earth. So, we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, because we know and believe that what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal (2 Corinthians 4:16-18; 5:7). We also trust God’s Word, which says He is constantly working things together for the good of those who love Him and have been called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28). Even though we do not always see the good ends to which God is working things out, we can be assured that a time will come when we will understand and see more clearly.

Our lives are like a quilt. If you look at the back side of a quilt, all you see is a mess of knots and loose ends hanging out all over. It is very unattractive, and there seems to be no rhyme or reason to the work. Yet when you turn the quilt over, you see how the maker has craftily woven together each strand to form a beautiful creation, much like the life of a believer (Isaiah 64:8). We live with a limited understanding of the things of God, yet a day is coming when we will know and understand all things (Job 37:5; Isaiah 40:28;Ecclesiastes 11:5; 1 Corinthians 13:12; 1 John 3:2). Where is God when it hurts? The message to take with you in hard times is that when you cannot see His hand, trust His heart, and know for certain that He has not forsaken you. When you seem to have no strength of your own, that is when you can most fully rest in His presence and know that His strength is made perfect in your weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9-10).

(Source: gotquestions.org, via iwilltrustinyou)

FROM LEE IN TENNESSEE: Q&A... What Do You Do When You're Pissed At God?

AMEN!

leeyounger:

Anonymous asked:

Something terrible just happened to me and if I’m being honest, I’m mad at God about it. I’ve been going back and forth from feeling pissed at God or else just feeling numb and I don’t want to be either of those things. I don’t know what to do.

..

So I Said:

First of all, I’m so sorry for what happened. I really, really am. For what it’s worth, my wife and I are praying for you and praying that God will bring about a solution to the whole thing quickly. 

The first thing I will tell you is that when things go terribly wrong, give yourself a lot of grace to feel what you feel about it. Not only that, but be real about your feelings. Feel free to tell God exactly how you feel. If you feel mad, tell Him. If you’re really, really mad at Him, tell Him. If you’re confused, hurt and sad about what went down, say that to Him. God’s a fully-grown, mature, complete and totally secure person. He can handle your emotions, and He wants to know the real you. 

Now, there’s a trick to the next part and you need to pay close attention: Even though you’re being honest about your emotions, don’t let your emotions run the show. In other words, there’s no use saying you’re not sad when you really are sad, but once you’ve expressed and felt that sadness, start learning what it means to believe in truths that are deeper and more true than your emotions. You see, even though our emotions can be good and help us know where we are and what we feel, they can also lie to us and they are certainly not the way to navigate your walk with God.

Here’s one example of what I mean: The thing that happened to you may make you feel like God isn’t in control of things, and that’s unsettling which may make you feel afraid. Tell God about that, but after you’ve been honest, allow God to tell you something. Let Him speak through His word and tell you something that is more true - something that goes even deeper than your feelings. Let His word speak into those fears and trust in what He says. Jesus said all authority has been given unto Him. Paul says God works out everything in accordance with the purpose of His will. He says everything works out for the good of those who love Him. It may not always feel like it, but God is totally in control.

That’s just one small example, but it should work that way with all of your emotions. The reason all those fearful and panicky emotions feel so gross is that the Holy Spirit is alive inside you and He’s wanting you to trust God’s word and be filled with peace. This is what we mean when we talk about “taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ” in 2 Corinthians 10:5.

In other words, it’s only natural to be emotionally rocked when terrible things happen and you should feel free to express those emotions. The difference in folks who know Jesus and everyone else is that we trust in truths that run deeper than our emotions. We stand on promises that are stronger than our feelings. 

As the Apostle John says in 1 John 3, “This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.”

..

ASK ME A QUESTION

FROM LEE IN TENNESSEE: It's Okay To Cry - A Quick Thought On Depression

yep. And it’s really cool how God also provides people in our lives to talk with too.

leeyounger:

I’ve been getting a lot of questions and messages about depression lately, and I wanted to make a couple of really broad-stroke comments for all my brothers and sisters out there who are struggling with sadness:

It’s okay to cry. 

It’s okay to struggle. 

It’s okay to scream and lash out. 

It’s perfectly okay to be completely honest about your emotions.

Sometimes Christians think that you can’t be honest about how you feel when you are really down because life with Jesus is supposed to be about triumph and joy. And don’t get me wrong - Jesus did come to give us life to the full, but that doesn’t mean you’re never going to suffer or struggle. Sometimes you get down and that’s okay. Sometimes you will be confused, caught off guard and unable to cope and that’s okay.

The question is, what are you supposed to do when you do feel that way?

Some Christians would tell you that you’re supposed to just suck it up, put on a smile and just sing “Hallelujah, praise the Lord!” But I don’t think the Lord would tell you that. The example that those Christians would give you would be Job, who lost everything in one day, including all of his children in a massive disaster and famously said, “The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord.” - But wait! Before Job ever gets to the worship part, he got up, tore his robes and shaved his head. Now, if you don’t know, tearing robes was a sign of absolute emotional unrest and distress. Calm people don’t tear their clothes. This wasn’t a ritual. It was a man on the brink of emotional collapse. He was furious. He was confused. He was unhinged to the core. The man grabbed his own collar and destroyed his garments by brute force and then shaved his head. He was extremely upset. 

The thing I want you to know is that two verses later, the narrator tells us that in all this, Job did not sin. You see that? This emotional honesty was right on the money and it enabled Job to get to the place of trust and worship. Job’s worship was remarkable not because He put a good face on his suffering, but because He gave full vent to his pain and then worshiped God in the honesty of his pain and confusion.

If you’re depressed, you’re not sinning. Tell God how you feel. Tell Him everything. God is not afraid of your emotions. God is no stranger to your heart. He already knows every twist and turn better than you do. You will never really get to the place of worship until you have first been honest about how you feel. Start there. Tell God everything, and when you have said it all, you’ll be ready to listen.

Faf'sThoughts: 10 Ways To Shred StuVac For Christ's Glory

fafdriscoll:

StuVac (or whatever you call it…that time when you get time off to catch up on everything you’ve missed/revise if you’ve been a good little sutdious studier all semester), I’ve noticed, can either be wasted, stressful, or just plain crap, and sometimes all of the above. Here are ten things…

click the linky! just a bookmark for myself - things I shouldn’t forget